Ever since Ansh turned 3, I have been contemplating having a second child. I always thought that hubby will readily agree. But he did not. He said that he is not ready for another & that in some ways he feels satisfied at just having one child. I also let it go then & so every time anyone asks me about it I just say that we'll see. But now I am 31 & time is running out. I know that it's now or never. So yesterday I had a serious conversation with Hubby. He was not quite ready to talk about it . So he needs time & that's where we are at present.
However, I do not know why I want another one. I feel very complete with Ansh. I feel Ansh needs a sibling but then I also know that this can't be the only reason to consider having a second .
I know it's going to be tough with my job & work hours to manage two. We do not have enough space in the house. We would need lots of help. I would have to postpone lots of dreams & nurture new ones.
But last night , after our conversation, I almost relived my entire pregnancy in my mind & it felt great.
My life, (aside from the family problems), as in the three of us, is great right now. I would not want to change a thing. I do not know how I will cope in terms of time.
Conclusion...........I am completely confused!!
6 years ago
17 comments:
:) what can I say more than read my post here http://doiwrite.blogspot.com/2008/05/second-childthe-dilemma-continues.html
And I was never convinced with the phrase, "The first child is for the parents an the second is for the first child". But now when I've my first child I can understand what it means very well :)
And this http://doiwrite.blogspot.com/2007/07/to-have-or-not-to-have-is-question.html
I hate this topic because The Guy and I still can't make up our mind about having our first child! I think I'm being a total escapist.
Good luck with your decision Monika!
Dear Monika,
I am so glad you're going about this sensibly. Talking about it is the way to go.
I really can't say much to you, because...you know.
I hope you both come to a decision soon. But know this, that there is no absolute right or wrong decision here, because whatever you decide will be right.
Good luck and God speed!
@nm- Your decisions is made & the question is "when". I am still lingering. Are your thoughts still the same after your May post?
@D- You know, I am dreading the answer that hubby will give. Either way, it's going to be tough.
@Cherie- Thanks :)
@M4- How did u arrive at your decision to have YO?
I loved your approach on this... as of now both me and hubby are in sync with this we dont want another child and incase we need to whatever reasons mentioned above we will probably adopt... but thats now... god knows what happens next
this is very personal decision and i hope u take urs together and both are happy with it :)
hugs
@Monika- I am glad you are at peace with whatever u have decided.
No..the decision was taken then and I'm again confused now :P
@nm- Oh! So, we are sailing in the same boat. :(
:)
all the best Monika! for clearing your confusion and taking the decision! its equally difficult eitherways, nahi?!
we both are keen on 2nd baby, but things need to fall in place, finances sorted and health getting good enough to concieve are things on our mind! :)
cheers!
abha
@Mama Mia- Thanks for the wishes. I need them big time :)
Hi Monika, I came to your blog from Mamma of Twins Blog.
My personal feeling, only if there is a minimum gap between the kids, it will be good. Me & my sis had a 1 year gap. Both my parents were working. Your child will not feel lonely.
Hey even we want another chile. But dont know how we will manage and when is the right time :P
@Devasena- Welcome to my space :). Do u 5-6 years is a bit too much gap?
@Swati-That's the whole issue. You never know when is the right time! Phew! Why r these decisions so tough!
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